Tell That to My Heart Read online

  Keith gave a throaty laugh. ‘Aye, nowt as greedy as a Labrador, is there? Governed by their bellies, they are.’

  ‘You’re not wrong. I’m sure Herbert would eat until he burst.’

  Next stop was the village shop where Mim stocked up on essentials as well as her favourite Dolly Mixtures and a bottle of Prosecco to take with her to Carly’s that night.

  ‘Looks like a weekend survival kit in there.’ Lou handed her the bag of shopping, making Mim laugh.

  ‘You’re not wrong. Actually, I’ve been meaning to ask, are you going to Carly’s next week?’

  ‘Aye, are you?’

  ‘Yeah, I’m looking forward to it, seems ages since our last get-together.’

  ‘It does. Though, I must tell, you, Carly was in here earlier and told me what she’d said about the kinky underwear thing. You can imagine the fun I had with nosey Pat Motson when she came in for her bread and newspaper. And I might have mentioned a male stripper would be joining us, too.’

  Mim burst out laughing. ‘You did what?’

  ‘I couldn’t help myself. I overheard the spiteful old witch having a bitching session with Cath Jones at the back of the shop. Pulling everyone apart they were. I’ve no time for the pair of them. Pass themselves off as holier than thou, but haven’t got a nice word to say about anyone.’

  ‘You’re right there. But how on earth did you find a way to tell Pat Motson about a stripper going to Carly’s?’

  ‘Well, I just sort of dropped it into the conversation.’

  ‘As you do.’

  ‘Exactly! I just asked Pat if she’d be joining us, and wondered if she’d got one of the kinky underwear catalogues to order from in advance. Then I just sort of mentioned how a much-in-demand male stripper by the name of Hosé Horny was going to be there. And I might’ve told her that she’d need to be quick if she wanted to tuck a tenner in the waistband of his underpants ’cos they wouldn’t be on for long.’

  ‘You didn’t?’

  ‘I did.’

  ‘You’re wicked! Does Carly know?’ Mim could barely speak, tears of mirth pouring down her cheeks.

  ‘Yep; she thinks it’s fabulous.’

  ‘Yes, I can imagine she would. Well, I’d best head back home, Herbert’s desperate to get stuck into the bone Keith from the butchers gave him. And he’s also in desperate need of a bath; judging by the smell of him, he’s been rolling in fox poo again, little sod’ Mim gathered up the bag from the counter. ‘I’ll see you later.’

  ‘See you, chick.’

  10

  It was just after one forty-five when Mim heard the sound of Anna-Lisa’s baby-pink Fiat 500 pull up in front of the cottage. She ran to the door, happy to see her friend. Though they worked together, they hadn’t had a proper chance to mull over the events of the previous week, nor have a proper chinwag about anything else, and Mim was looking forward to spending time with her friend. Herbert was hot on her heels, his tail wagging enthusiastically. ‘Hiya, Anna, need a hand bringing anything in?’

  Anna-Lisa slung her burgundy Fjallraven backpack over her shoulder and closed the door before heading round to the boot of the car, the buckles of her favourite chunky biker boots jangling as she walked. She was wearing a pair of black skinny jeans with slashes to the knees, and an oversized black and white dogs-tooth coat over a pink slogan t-shirt. Her candyfloss-coloured hair had been scraped up into a messy bun, fine tendrils falling softly over her pretty face. ‘You can grab this for me if you like.’ She pulled out a bulging carrier bag. ‘Supplies for tonight.’

  ‘Ooh, fab!’ Mim flicked her plait over her shoulder and headed down the path. She went to open the gate but the solid body of Herbert was in the way. ‘S’cuse me, Herbs, you’re going to have to get your nose out of the way if you want me to open it.’

  Herbert took a step back, shooting out as soon as he was able, charging over to greet Anna-Lisa. ‘Hiya, gorgeous boy, how are you?’ She bent to stroke his head. ‘I swear you get more handsome every time I see you, you really do.’

  ‘That’s probably because he’s just had a shower after spending most of his walk charging through muddy puddles then rolling in a load of fox poo. I can’t tell you how glad I am that Josie and Russ saw fit to install a shower for him in the outbuilding. I dread to think how hard it would be to get him in the bath, or the mess it’d make. Not to mention how much Josie would hate that idea. Anyway, at least he’s clean now, but he got bored of me drying him so he smells a bit of wet cabbage, I’m afraid, which I can promise you is infinitely better than the way he smelt before.’

  Anna-Lisa crumpled her nose. ‘I’ll take your word for it. Anyway there’s a T.R.E.A.T. for him in the bag, along with wine and nibbles for tonight – they’re for us.’

  Herbert’s ears pricked up and his tail swished happily.

  ‘Good to know.’ Mim took the bag. ‘And you do know he can spell, don’t you?’

  ‘Ah, I’d clean forgotten.’ She glanced at Herbert who had a hopeful look in his eyes.

  ‘And you wouldn’t believe how many T.R.E.A.T.s he’s had today; he’s been very spoilt.’

  ‘Nice jeans by the way, are they new?’

  ‘Thanks, yep, I picked them up in the sale. I’ve been after a pair of Levi’s 311s for ages and snapped them up as soon as I saw them reduced. They’re perfect for getting my wobbly bum and fat podge under control; they give it a bit of much-needed scaffolding.’ Mim patted her stomach.

  Anna-Lisa tutted. ‘You haven’t got a wobbly or fat anything, never mind bum or podge for that matter. Stop putting yourself down, Mim.’

  ‘You only say that because you haven’t seen me naked.’

  ‘True, and can I just say, much as I love you dearly, I’d like it to stay that way.’ Anna-Lisa giggled. She followed Mim down the hall, Herbert trotting close behind, her face a picture when she took in the state of the kitchen. ‘Jeez, Mim, what have you been doing? It’s a tip in here; anyone would think the place had been ransacked.’

  Mim set the carrier bag down on the table, reaching inside for the wine. She had the good grace to look sheepish. ‘I know, I didn’t mean for it to get this messy but with everything that’s happened this week, I just couldn’t face cleaning. I’m going to tackle it tomorrow in case Josie Skypes. Anyway, let’s forget about the mess for now; I’ll pop this in the fridge, but don’t let me forget to take it out before we go to Carly’s.’

  ‘I won’t. And can I just say, there was some frantic curtain twitching going on along at Cuckoo’s Nest Cottage when I arrived. I’ve never known it so bad. I wonder what could be the cause?’ There was a hint of sarcasm in her voice.

  ‘You won’t believe it when I tell you.’

  ‘I bet I would.’

  ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘Could it be something to do with the appearance of a certain dark-haired gentleman dropping you off and picking you up this week?’

  ‘Oh, no, it’s not that.’

  ‘Really? Don’t tell me she hasn’t noticed the Dark Count and his fancy car.’

  That’s what Carly calls him, too. ‘Ah, well, I suppose she has but that’s not what I meant.’ Mim felt her cheeks flush. ‘It’s to do with some of Carly’s mischief. Come on, let’s head to the pub while they’re still serving food, and I’ll fill you in on all the details when we get there.’

  The two women found a sunny table in the cosy bar of the pub. The mouth-watering aroma of roast dinners – something the pub had gained quite a reputation for – filled the air, making Mim’s stomach rumble. She sat on the banquette, glad to feel the soothing rays of the sun warming the back of her neck. Herbert flopped down on the floor beside her while Anna-Lisa went to order their food at the bar.

  ‘Here you go, get that down you.’ Anna-Lisa set a large glass of cider down on the table in front of Mim. She pulled out a stool opposite and sat down before taking a slow sip of her pint of beer. ‘Mmm. That’s so good.’

  ‘Cheers,’ said Mim, raising her glass
.

  ‘Oops, sorry, I was so keen to get that down me I forgot! Cheers to the bloody weekend at last.’ Anna-Lisa clinked her glass against Mim’s.

  ‘My thoughts exactly.’

  ‘And what a week; if feels like about a dozen of them have been crammed into one. And I’ve hated pretty much every minute so I dread to think how it’s been for you.’

  Mim sat back and sighed. ‘It’s been pretty shitty at work, I have to say, what with Honey and all the weirdness with Catherine, but other stuff hasn’t been too bad. Except how could I forget I’ve gone and wrecked my prized leather jacket, look. I’ve tried to fix it, but nothing seems to work. I’m gutted.’

  Anna-Lisa gave the scuffed sleeve of Mim’s leather jacket a cursory glance before fixing her friend with a steely gaze. ‘Hmm. Shame, looks like you’ve taken the top layer of dye off. And what do you mean about other stuff not being too bad?’

  Mim felt a surge of excitement as Caspar crept into her mind, replaying their illicit night of passion, the feel of his hands on her body… Her stomach leapt and she felt her cheeks flush. His words telling her to keep their relationship a secret flashed before her. But she and Anna-Lisa shared everything…

  ‘Come on, spill, I can tell you’re keeping something from me. Is it to do with the Dark Count?’

  Oh, if only I could tell you!

  ‘Stop calling him that.’ Mim laughed. Her mind was whirling, she so desperately wanted to share her news with her best friend, tell her how she was feeling, explain how this with Caspar was different. But at the same time, she didn’t want to break his trust, didn’t want to hear Anna-Lisa’s warnings.

  In the end, it didn’t take her friend long to wear her down. ‘I thought we were best mates, Mim; looked out for each other, shared everything. What’s changed? It’s like you suddenly don’t trust me or something.’

  ‘I do trust you, honest I do, Anna, it’s just—’

  ‘What? Did he tell you not to say anything? Please tell me you’re not going to let a bloke come between us; we’re best mates.’

  ‘I would never do that, Anna, you know how much I value our friendship, but Caspar told me it was probably best to keep us a secret.’

  ‘You’re an “us” already? That didn’t take long, and why doesn’t he want you to tell anyone. You’re a babe and lovely with it; he should be wanting to shout it from the rooftops.’

  Mim could sense her friend was trying to hide the fact that she was a little put out by the revelation, and was keen to smooth things over. ‘It wasn’t so much you, but he doesn’t want the Pallister-Biggs to find out in case they get funny about it, you know what they’re like. And Catherine in particular seems to have got it in for me at the moment, you know that.’

  ‘Hmm. It still doesn’t mean you couldn’t tell me; we’ve always told each other everything. It just makes me feel a bit worried that he’s said that, that’s all. It seems a bit off. But, cross my heart, I won’t breathe a word to anyone.’

  ‘Thanks, Anna, and I know you’re suspicious of him, but he’s really lovely when you get to know him, and he makes me feel special. Really special. The things he was saying to me last night … he told me that I’m beautiful and “deliciously voluptuous” – which I know I’m not but he made me feel that way last night – and no one else has ever said anything like that to me before.’

  ‘Oh, Mim, chick, you are special but you’ve dated so many losers they’ve made you lose sight of that fact. I love you to bits and just don’t want to see you hurt, that’s all. I want you to be happy and be with someone who really deserves you. Aidey’s been worried too.’

  An image of Aidey’s kind face flashed across Mim’s mind, his green eyes smiling, his hair standing on end as it always did thanks to his habit of pushing his fingers through it, the sprinkling of freckles across his nose. It triggered a feeling of warmth inside her. He was a good sort, Aidey, someone who made her feel safe, like the world was a better place when she was with him. Yep, he was definitely one of the best mates a girl could have.

  Mim sighed. ‘I really appreciate your concern, and Aidey’s too, but I don’t need you to worry about me, I’m fine. I’m actually worried about Aidey; he hasn’t been himself at all this week, which is understandable with everything that’s happened.’ Time to turn attention away from herself.

  ‘Too true, he’s had a totally crap week, what with how the Pallister-Biggs have treated him. He’s worth more than that, and he’s so good at his job, or should I say, was good at his job, now that the Dark Count has stepped into his shoes and taken it. Not that he won’t be good at what he’s doing now, but his heart’s not in it. I actually wouldn’t be surprised if he leaves, nor could I blame him.’

  ‘Yeah, that had crossed my mind. It’ll be a shame if he does, but in all honesty, I can’t really see myself being there for that much longer, whether it’s because Catherine finds some reason to sack me, or because I find another job before she gets the chance.’

  ‘Seriously, you’re thinking about leaving?’

  Mim took a sip of her cider and nodded. ‘The thought had crossed my mind after Honey’s arrival.’

  ‘Jeez, it’ll be totally shite if both you and Aidey leave. I don’t think I could stand it on my own without you. Clarissa’s okay, but she’s not you two, and she’ll always be a Pallister-Biggs no matter how much she wants to fit in with us.’

  ‘Yeah, she’s a nice lass. I feel sorry for her being part of that family.’

  ‘Me, too, especially when she’s the talent behind the magazine while her parents brazenly take all the credit.’

  ‘True. Anyway, how are things with you and Caleb? Is he still driving you bonkers with his computer games?’

  ‘Uhh, please don’t mention those bloody games! He spends more time playing them and communicating with his friends than he does talking to me. I swear if he spends much longer in that spare room – or “computer room” as he now calls it – I’ll forget what he actually looks like.’

  ‘Has it got that bad?’

  ‘Well, maybe that’s a slight exaggeration, but he does spend the bulk of the time he’s at home in there. Feels like he only ventures out to eat, bathe and sleep.’

  ‘Oh, dear.’ Mim’s heart went out to her friend. Though Anna’s exterior gave the impression she was as hard as nails, Mim knew beneath it was a centre as soft as marshmallow. Her friend’s tough childhood had left its mark; she rarely talked about her feelings and was as tight as a clam as far as matters of the heart were concerned. But it was obvious to Mim that, despite Anna’s declaration that she didn’t believe in love, deep down, she was pretty keen on Caleb.

  ‘Yes, “oh dear”. He doesn’t even meet up with his friends physically anymore, they seem happier to chat via that daft dragon game. It’s all very odd. Anyway, that’s enough about him, I intend to enjoy myself tonight while he’s the sadster at home in a poky little room with nothing but a computer for company.’

  ‘I’m sorry to hear it’s like that for you; don’t forget, I’m here if you ever need to talk, chick.’ Mim knew not to push her friend; she’d open up when she was ready.

  Their conversation was interrupted by the arrival of Julie the landlady holding two plates of steaming food in her hands. ‘Hello there, ladies, two roast dinners for you.’

  ‘Mmm, smells delicious, thanks, Julie,’ said Mim.

  ‘And mind the plates; they’re red-hot.’

  ‘Will do, thanks for the warning.’

  Herbert sat to attention, his eyes flicking greedily from plate to plate.

  ‘This isn’t for you, Herbs. Lie down, please,’ said Mim.

  Herbert looked at her with pleading eyes.

  ‘And the woeful, please-feed-me-I’m-starving look won’t work either, you’ve had loads to eat today, any more and I think you’ll pop. Lie down, please.’

  With a noisy harrumph, Herbert obeyed.

  ‘Good lad,’ said Mim.

  Julie threw the tea-towel she’d been u
sing to hold the plates over her shoulder. ‘So, what’s this I hear about Carly having a kinky underwear party, and is there any truth in the rumour that there’s going to be a rather hot male stripper? Oh, and is the vicar’s wife’s going? And, more importantly, if it is all true, how do I get myself an invite?’

  ‘What’s this?’ Anna-Lisa looked at Mim, her eyes like saucers. ‘You’ve never mentioned any of this before, I thought it was just the usual wine and catch-up night.’

  Mim giggled and gestured for them to move closer. Lowering her voice to a whisper she said, ‘It’s not true. Carly just started the rumour about having a kinky undies party to wind Pat Motson up, and it was Lou who added the bit about Hosé Horny the male stripper.’

  ‘Oh, that’s hilarious,’ said Julie, giggling.

  Anna-Lisa burst out laughing. ‘Hosé Horny, I love it!’

  ‘Shhh,’ said Mim. ‘We mustn’t let folk find out it’s a joke, we really want the curtain twitchers to think it’s true. Carly wants to see how long it’ll take to get round the village.’

  ‘Uhh, it won’t take that miserable old bugger long to spread the word,’ said Julie. ‘She’s a right gossip.’

  ‘That’s an understatement,’ said Anna-Lisa.

  ‘Carly just wants to have a bit of fun with this, then we can all thoroughly enjoy the sight of the woman getting egg all over her face when she finds out she’s had the mickey taken out of her,’ said Mim.

  ‘Brilliant! Be sure to keep me posted, but in the meantime my lips are sealed. And now I’d best get back to the bar, there’s a queue forming and Bill’s looking a bit flustered. Enjoy your food, lasses.’

  ‘Fancy a coffee?’ asked Mim. She was in the kitchen of Pear Tree Cottage with Anna-Lisa. Herbert had flaked out in his bed and was snoring softly.

  ‘Sounds good. That’s the worst thing about having a drink in the afternoon; it makes me feel so sleepy. I need a nice strong hit of caffeine to wake me up or I’ll end up snoring my head off like Herbs.’